|
| |
|
The Passing of a Friend |
Today we mourn the passing of an old friend, by the name of Common
Sense.
Common Sense lived a long life but died recently in the United
States. No one really knows how old he was, since his birth records
were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He selflessly devoted his life to service in schools, hospitals,
homes, factories and helping folks get jobs done without fanfare and
foolishness. For decades, petty rules, silly laws, and frivolous
lawsuits held no power over Common Sense.
He was credited with cultivating such valued lessons as to know when
to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, and
that life isn't always fair.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend
more than you earn), reliable parenting strategies (the adults are
in charge, not the kids), and it's okay to come in second.
A veteran of the Industrial Revolution, the Great Depression, and
the Technological Revolution, Common Sense survived cultural and
educational trends including body piercing, whole language, and "new
math."
His health declined when he became infected with the
"If-it-only-helps-one-person-it's-worth-it" virus. In recent decades
his waning strength proved no match for the ravages of well
intentioned but overbearing regulations.
He watched in pain as good people became ruled by self-seeking
lawyers.
His health rapidly deteriorated when schools endlessly implemented
zero-tolerance policies. Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with
sexual harassment for kissing a classmate, a teen suspended for
taking a swig of mouthwash after lunch, and a teacher fired for
reprimanding an unruly student only worsened his condition. It
declined even further when schools had to get parental consent to
administer aspirin to a student but could not inform the parent when
a female student was pregnant or wanted an abortion.
Common Sense lost his will to live as the Ten Commandments became
contraband, churches became businesses, criminals received better
treatment than victims, and federal judges stuck their noses in
everything from the Boy Scouts to professional sports.
Finally, when people, too stupid to realize that a steaming cup of
coffee was hot, were awarded a huge settlement, Common Sense threw
in the towel.
As the end neared, Common Sense drifted in and out of logic but was
kept informed of developments regarding questionable regulations
such as those for low flow toilets, rocking chairs, and stepladders.
Common Sense was preceded in death by:
his parents, Truth and Trust;
his wife, Discretion;
his daughter, Responsibility; and
his son, Reason.
He is survived by two stepbrothers:
My Rights, and Ima Whiner.
Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone |
|
